We recently sat down and spoke with Richard, who told us more about how our Bereavement Support helped him after his best friend died.

A safety net

When telling us about his friend, who Richard first met at a choir, he said: “Simon was in palliative care having waited a year for a heart transplant, and became too poorly to receive one.”

It wasn’t long before Richard needed some support. He explains: “A good friend of ours gently pointed me in the direction of your services. I didn’t think, at that time, that I’d need support, but my friend was wiser than I. I followed her suggestion and requested your counselling service.

“I was assessed before Simon died and counselling began, fortunately, the day after he died! I couldn’t have been in better hands.

“I described it as if I was aimlessly rock climbing and coming to counselling each week clipped me into the rock face. I therefore could go on climbing, knowing that if I fell, I couldn’t fall far before coming back again. It was a very necessary safety net.”

The perfect place to be

Richard continued: “I knew that I found talking therapy very beneficial in the past, and that coming to the hospice for counselling was the perfect place to be. 

“I have come away with a far more profound understanding of grief.”

When we asked Richard what he’d say to someone wondering whether to reach out for our help, he said: “I would suggest there is no need to struggle, and to sign up for support from the Hospice – a place where grief is normalised, whether that’s in counselling or the monthly grief groups.”

The power of music

He added: “When words are hard to come by, I’ve used the power of music. I’ve played the piano all the way through grief, played every emotion going. It’s kept me mentally well and has given me a healthy outlet for my grief.

“I’ve been really well supported by our choir. If you want to make music, need a hand or a hug, join a choir!”

Forever grateful

Richard recently raised money for the Hospice through a swimming challenge, which involved swimming the distance of the length of Lake Grasmere. He raised £812, funding 40 bereavement sessions!

When reflecting on why he took this on, he said: “I wanted to pay forward for the grief counselling that I had received.

“I shall be forever grateful for the support of the grief counsellor at what was the most painful, bewildering, surreal and difficult of times. I’d like others to be able to access that, too. No one need be bereft alone.”

Check out challenges you could take on for the Hospice, and find out more about Bereavement Support.